The day had dawned sunny but as the Jezebels prepared to wage war against the Amazons of the City it began to drizzle. Players were unsure of the sex of the opposing team but bravely stepped on to the field and battle cries began. Knowing that we had the advantage in numbers we casually kept the ball away from our goal. Megan in goals was often in need of defrosting as the ball rarely came her way due to the skill and determination of the backs, led by Del.
5 minutes into the first half the ball was crossed expertly across the face of City's goals and Rohini was in a perfect (unmarked - City fails defending 101) position to score...and she did!
Highlights of the first half included a still drunk Zoe replacing Del (in a clever move by coach Clare who was getting tired of her rantings and was still shivering from being doused by water by Zoe) challenging Cinnamon (also known as the team's stunt double) in a handstand competition... much to Megan's amusement. Kate brilliantly took shot after shot after shot after shot at goal but to no avail. But the brave forwards kept trying! The next highlight was Cinnamon doing the splits while trying to stop the ball.. much to the horror of the entire Dickson playing fields. Assuring everyone they were only 'jazz splits' and therefore didn't hurt Rohini suggested more splits would help distract the opposing team in the second half. After some brilliant contributions by our team members from 4ths the first whistle blew to 1-0.
In the second half the Jezebels were determined to beat these she-men who knew they were incredibly outclassed by ANU. Kathleen and Miriam put on brave faces against their opponents who were triple their size. And wouldn't you know it, in almost a repeat of last weeks game a goal was scored within the first few minutes!! Hurrah!! No one noticed of course it came off a Canberra City boot - who cares!! Brilliantly set up by all forwards! Other highlights included a commando roll by Kate and.. Ro's battle cries and super kicks intimidating the goalie into inaction.
Numerous more shots at goal occured but to no avail despite the lack of skill employed by the opposing goalie. As the final whistle blew our fearless goalie Megan had to be defrosted off the pitch and we were VICTORIOUS!!! and thankfully pretty much injury free!!
Thanks to Annika's mumma giving us the extra support we needed.
In memory of those missing in action.. Carly and Helen.
Cinnamon van Reyk.
The game for the Jezebels this week started off fantastically - when we saw that our team mascot had come to ref for us again (see match report from 24th July)! We were naturally all very excited about this, and psyched up to play a great game, with two new coaches in the form of Kathleen and Miriam, seeing as Clare had taken the opportunity to go off and get really really hammered at Cat's 21st. Kathleen and Miriam did an awesome job of filling this role - Clare had better watch out or we'll put her on the bench!! Haha KIDDING CLARE!!! KIDDING!! please don't bench me!!! hahaha.
The first half was a little slow in starting, with the Grammar kiddilywinks bunching up a heap, so that in order to mark them we had to do the same. Communication between Uni players picked up fast however, and the ball stayed in their half for all but about 2 minutes of this half. Unfortunately, despite the fact that we had about a million shots on goal, none of us managed to convert. This was very frustrating seeing as we were clearly a better team. I yelled a lot... as did Cinnamon, but it didn't seem to help. Special mention to Lexi, who took some awesome corner kicks.
The whistle blew for half time, and we all went to eat some lollies and figure out what was happening to our game. With a plan in hand, we marched back onto the field. We took the kick off, passed beautifully as planned, and worked the ball nicely up the field to Ro who slotted it into goal. Nice. We got a bit complacent at this point, which needless to say, was a bad move. There was one particularly heartstopping moment where one of their very fast strikers (who apparently wasn't actually a div 5 player, but we won't mention that, because we won anyway so who cares :-)) took a sprint toward goal. Our backs ran their little legs off but the closest were still about 15m away from catching her. Then out of nowhere, hurtled Miriam, took the ball from the Grammar player like it was a walk in the park, and promptly booted it back up the field. We pushed back into their half, where Lexi took an awesome kick from just past the half way mark, with the intention of getting the ball further up the field, but which sailed right into the goal. We're not complaining. I think Ruth deserves a mention for this goal as well, as she charged after the ball looking very intimidating, and although she didn't touch it, she scared the crap out of their goalie who consequently didn't come anywhere near it. Awesome work.
We took another few million shots on goal after this, but didn't convert. So final score was a comfortable 2-0 win. Could've been better but was still an awesome game. Special mentions to Ness - thanks so much for coming to play for us, Cinnamon - damn you were scary!! First to the ball every time, 2 * Ro - awesome running... actually I'd like to mention everyone, cos we played awesome guys!! Good job all round!
Oh... and we fed our mascot lollies... after the game was finished of
course, we wouldn't want those Grammar girls with crushes on our
cutie-Ref-mascot to think it was bribery... definately a highlight of the
match anyway.
Kate Phillips
A tropical climate greeted the Jezebels as they trecked to what can only be described as God's Country (ie: Wanniassa). The brave underdogs were up against top of the ladder Woden.
Not to be daunted however, the Jezzies noticed that Woden were in fact, quite old and quite rubbish, so if any hint of pressure was applied Woden would crumble. And crumble they did. The Jezebels were all over the game, with some lovely passing up the middle of the field and super fast wings taking the ball up to the goals again and again.
Tragically, all this on-field magic didn't quite lead to any goals, although the Jezebels had loads of beautiful shots.
At half time it was 0-0 and the Jezebels were fired up to score in the second half. Unfortunately, by the second half Wode had devised a new tactic - crowd the ball (in a similar vein to an under 6s match - I meant them Zoe, not us!) so that the poor Jezebels couldn't get it.
Woden had two lousy shots all game....however one of them went in.
The game ended with a 1-0 victory to Woden, but if that's what top of the ladder looks like, bring on the finals!
Coach Clare
Well this weekend saw another brilliant attack of the Jezebels (who could otherwise be referred to as ‘the Dominators’), as we successfully mastered our opponents in all aspects of play to gain complete control over the game. Unfortunately however, our opposition, who I shall refer to as ‘the little people’, were extremely skilled in the art of obstruction. Their constant loitering around our feet paid off on numerous occasions, with perhaps 90% of our team experiencing at least one disastrous stack. Kate took the first honours, plummeting to the ground after one of the sneaky little midgets was successful in their ankle nipping. From then on it was all down hill: the little rascals slowly worked their way through all the brave Jezebels (AKA ‘Dominators’) with masterful techniques including head clashing and balls to the head. Until finally, the fall of the bravest Jezebel of all: the Courageous Carly. This young lass was a pilar of strength in her weakest hour, perfecting the art of bong humour and entertaining us all despite her dire pain.
The game was called a little over half time, results pending soccer Canberra’s review. However this is a formality only, we all know the true superiority of the super Jezebels regardless of the formal outcome. Good work girls, everyone played a superb match and should be proud of themselves!!!
In other news:
The adoption papers of ref should be forwarded to us as soon as possible so ensure his career as our team mascot begins immediately :)
Miriam Glennie
Sunday 16th July saw the Jezebels return from a three week break during which the closest many of the team came to a soccer ball was walking past the local sports shop. Certainly not ideal preparation for a match against top of the ladder Cooma, a team that really should not be playing in this division. In spite of some noticable imporvements over the last time we played them, Cooma still dominated the game, a fact reflected in the final score: Cooma 7 ANU 0.
Ruth Mills
The Jezabels just keep on improving; this week losing narrowly (1-0) to Weston Creek despite being a player short and the majority of the team suffering from a big Sat night. We manage to hold them out till the last 10 minutes when they scored. Special mentions to Annika – playing on despite injury, Ruth – who seemed to be all over the field at once, Zoe and Carly – for their impenetrable defence, Charmaine – for playing without spewing, Coach Clare – for spewing, and the Ref – for liking us more than Weston Creek. That said, everyone played commendably and we are playing more and more like a team each game.
Pip Walter
ANU Women's Division 5 shone as they shivered on Sunday, defeating Lanyon in the icy winds and light rain. Swift tackling and strong passing ensured most of the play remained in ANUs half and secured a comfortable 2-0 victory. Despite a very muddy goal mouth Rowena made two great goals and goalie Megan made her awesome dives in the mud. Excellent tackling and passing by Lexi, Cinnamon and Charmayne. Great dancing by Kathleen. Awesome support by Kate coming to watch and cheer in the miserable weather.
Amy Lovesey
The showdown between Grammar Green (i.e. Pre-school) and Uni Div 5, on Sunday 5th June ‘05’, will go down in history as The Day That Div 5 Fired Up!
The game started off a little slow, with cocky Uni dreaming of absolutely annihilating the 13 year olds we were playing. HOWEVER…this was not to be the case. All the talent was there, but there was one crucial element that we had no control over… the incompetence of our ref. In short, he sucked. Our mothers could have done a better job. There were numerous stuff-ups by him, including admitting he was incredibly hung-over before the game, giving a warning to one of the nicest girls on the team, giving the children a penalty shot for falling over, calling the ball “out” when it was totally “in” (maybe 3 metres in!), and telling our side, in half-time, that he may have made a mistake about the penalty shot call and we shouldn’t tell anyone!
Really, though, we should thank him. We were all so unbelievably angered by his actions, that we decided to, subconsciously, take it out on the soccer game, and played one of the best (if not THE best) games EVER! We shone through the biased decisions, and played with great sportsmanship and passion. After gaining a goal FAIR AND SQUARE, we tied with Pre-school one all.
Congratulations to all of the players….we were brilliant; they knew it, their parents knew it, the ref knew it, and now he has to deal with the Head Of Refs! Good luck with that.
Demelza Corish
Whoo Hoo! Our first win of the season and what a fantastic game it was. The match was held in some sort of a swamp/desert at UC, one end of the pitch was water logged while the other felt like we were horses running on concrete. We thought we could be in some trouble when members of our team were too hung over to take off their sunglasses and most of their team wasn’t even old enough to drink, but we managed to perform once the game started.
Our fears were eased once the whistle was blown and we realised not only were they too young to drink but most of them were from Grammar Primary. Anyway, we won the ability to keep our keeper clean in the first half of the match which she was very pleased about. We came out strong and had about 40 shots on goal until our striker Rowena finally got one pass the keeper. It was on for young and old then. Again we had more practice at kicking directly to the keeper and then it was half time. We came out firing in the second half, but the little ankle biters didn’t give up easily. Rowena scored a ripper to make it two – nil and the victory looked imminent except Coach Clare told us not to get complacent. Our defenders took this advice a bit too seriously and took out a striker who went too close to our goal by cannoning the ball in her face and dislodging her nose. After this excitement Rowena was denied a hat trick by a poor off side decision by the linesman, who I am pretty sure goes to ANU, but her determination was too great to be stopped by some punk.
Soon after both Amy and Ruth scored awesome goals after being fed beautiful balls from the backs and wings to bring the score up to 4 – nil. Rowena scored the final goal to keep her on a hat trick streak and we won the game 5 – nil. At the end the only person complaining was Megan our goalie, who said it was too boring because she had nothing to do, but I would have thought she preferred this to the rest of our games this season when she received most of the ball. We’ve had the taste of winning now so Grammar Green better watch out in Mawson next week.
Thanks to all those who played down for us, Merissa, Steph and Emma you were awesome and thanks to our fan club which is growing bigger every week.
Kathleen Higgins
This week the div 5s played Weston Creek, aka the Xenas, down in Wanniassa. A heap of people from our team couldn’t play this week, so we were joined by Mac, Steph and Kym from other divs. This was an awesome inspiration for us – Steph did an awesome job running the wing, Kym was a great back, and then goalie when ours was unexpectedly taken down due to a shoulder injury (although our team was very confused as to what her name actually was, seeing as Emma was the name put on the match card, and so we were calling her that!), and Mac was an awesome mid with very tricky footwork. She was even heard to comment ‘it’s great playing here, in div 3 you can never do all the turn-around-bet-you-didn’t-see-that-coming stuff, because they always know what you’re going to do, but here it’s great – you get away with it every time!’ (or words to that effect….) Unfortunately, even with their influence, we lost 4-0, and hence had to hear the Xena’s ‘wooohohohohohoho’ war-cry four times… actually I didn’t recognize the Xena reference until someone explained it to me… I was wondering why they were making ambulance/fire engine noises… but maybe that’s just me. Anyway, our team played really well overall I thought, though we were much better in the first half – probably just due to our fitness level! I’d like to keep with the div 5 tradition in questioning the sex of the opposite team, but I’m sad to say, they were all fairly clearly female this week, so we can’t accuse them of being filthy cheats. Another good game, we enjoyed ourselves at any rate! That’s all from div 5 for the week… J
Today we played Woden’s women’s fifth division team (though we have reason to believe they may not be all fifth division players… or women, for that matter). In any case, they were all a bit older than us, and as Claire said “that should mean we are fitter and faster than them”, though that wasn’t reflected in the final score of 3-0 (to them). We started off the game with great enthusiasm, and our three subs cheered supportively from the sideline while our opposition’s sole sub sweated in her boots.
At first we were perhaps lacking drive in going in for tackles and getting to the ball first, however, our confidence increased as the game went on (despite two goals scored against us during the half). This wasn’t at all the fault of our defensive players or our keeper who all did a terrific job. Zoe in particular did a terrific job as sweeper, and in fact throughout the game assisted in a whole range of back positions, much to the consternation of Claire who could be heard from the sideline yelling “Zoe! You’re not meant to be there… that’s someone else’s job! You’re the sweeper!”. Similarly, our attacking players put a lot of effort into getting the ball up the field. They didn’t get discouraged at all when, without fail, any ball we put up their end of the field was stopped by their sweeper who would promptly return it well into our half with her powerful boot. Rowena’s goal scoring capabilities were sadly inhibited by the state of the field, with a large patch of dirt spanning a region from our goals to their goals causing unpredictable bounces. In addition, on the day many of us (yours truly inclusive) were suffering from an unknown affliction which caused us to air-swing over the ball when attempting to kick it. We took great satisfaction in the fact that we nearly won the second half (we kept it to 1-0), and as we did our warm-down jog across the oval and back after the game, Kate, Kathleen and Carly did cartwheels of jubilation. Perhaps the highlight of the day was that, although Miriam took a dive, Helen got a ball in the forehead, Kathleen repeatedly had to tackle the woman with “the biggest bum in the world”, and Megan saved numerous attempts on goal, there were surprisingly no injuries resulting from the game.
Kim Collins
The Match this weekend saw the Jezebels up against Canberra City. Though Canberra City were down three players they were allowed several transgressions from the rules such as coaching from behind the goals and not sending players off for fouling and s**t language, so this evened the playing field a little.
The first half started strong for the Jezebels, with most of the play occurring in our half of the field. However, one of Canberra City’s players broke through our defence to score the first goal of the game (we are officially checking that this player is actually registered to play 5th grade – she was a little too quick to deny any questions regarding her previous experience on the field). However the Jezebels fought back and Rockin’ Ro scored two of her mighty four goals for the match.
In the second half, again most of the play was in the Jezebels half and Ro went on to score two more goals bringing the match to a draw. Canberra City actually gained another player and a keeper who could actually keep. They were a strong side - probably due to the fact that most of them were built like truckers and weren’t opposed to playing dirty. The Jezebels played an awesome and, more importantly, dignified second game. Once again, we have the moral victory.
Well done Jezebels!
Helen Sartori
On Sunday the first of May, the ANU Div 5 team, the Jezebels, played their first match.
The opposition : Team Cooma. They played dirty, swore, elbowed and kicked. They are meant to be a Div 3 team. The ref knew them all by first name. The majority were over 40 years old. There was serious doubt about the sex of one or two of the players. The prison overlooked the playing fields. Cooma is a hole.
However, these factors were an advantage to Team Cooma and they won 6 nil.
The Jezebels played an amazing first game together and we definately hold the moral highground!!
GO JEZEBELS!!
Carly Amber
TeamCarly AmberMelissa Boyle Kim Collins Demelza Corish Miriam Glennie Kathleen Higgins Grace Keesing Julia Lamb Annika Landsmann Rowena Martin Ruth Mills Kate Phillips Rowan Roberts Helen Sartens Zoe Speck Alexandra Spies Rohini Tendulkar Cinnamon Van Reyk Phillipa Walter Megan Wilson |